Inspirational quotes

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful

05/15/2018

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautifulBy See more RANDOM quotes

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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful

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Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food and companionship. She goes Mondays, I go Fridays.

05/15/2018

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food and companionship. She goes Mondays, I go Fridays.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food and companionship. She goes Mondays, I go Fridays.

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Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.

05/15/2018

Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.By Lord KelvinSee more RANDOM quotes

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Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.

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We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.

05/15/2018

We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.By Decca Recording Co.See more RANDOM quotes

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We don

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Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?

05/15/2018

Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?By H.M. Warner, Warner BrothersSee more RANDOM quotes

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Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?

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Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.

05/15/2018

Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.By Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at ToulouseSee more RANDOM quotes

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Louis Pasteur

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The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon.

05/15/2018

The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon.By Sir John Eric Erickson, British surgeonSee more RANDOM quotes

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The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon.

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Everything that can be invented has been invented.

05/15/2018

Everything that can be invented has been invented.By Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899.See more RANDOM quotes

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Everything that can be invented has been invented.

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If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.

05/15/2018

If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you

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This isn't burger king, you can't have it your way.

05/15/2018

This isn't burger king, you can't have it your way.By See more RANDOM quotes

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This isn

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If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.

05/15/2018

If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you try and don

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Don't talk about yourself so much... we'll do that when you leave.

05/15/2018

Don't talk about yourself so much... we'll do that when you leave.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Don

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Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting.

05/15/2018

Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting.

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What if, at this very moment, you are living up to your full potential?

05/15/2018

What if, at this very moment, you are living up to your full potential?By See more RANDOM quotes

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What if, at this very moment, you are living up to your full potential?

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It isn't pollution that's harming the environment, it's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it

05/15/2018

It isn't pollution that's harming the environment, it's the impurities in our air and water that are doing itBy Dan Quayle, Former US Vice PresidentSee more RANDOM quotes

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It isn

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No great man ever complains of want of opportunity.

05/15/2018

No great man ever complains of want of opportunity.By See more RANDOM quotes

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No great man ever complains of want of opportunity.

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The tragedy of life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach.

05/15/2018

The tragedy of life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach.By See more RANDOM quotes

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The tragedy of life doesn

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Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.

05/15/2018

Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.

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Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows.

05/15/2018

Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows.

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Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country

05/15/2018

Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the countryBy Mayor Marion Barry, Washington DCSee more RANDOM quotes

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Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country

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He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend; provided, of course, he really is dead.

05/15/2018

He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend; provided, of course, he really is dead.By Voltaire.See more RANDOM quotes

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He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend; provided, of course, he really is dead.

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There are 10 types of people in this world; those who understand the binary number system and those who do not

05/15/2018

There are 10 types of people in this world; those who understand the binary number system and those who do notBy See more RANDOM quotes

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There are 10 types of people in this world; those who understand the binary number system and those who do not

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Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy

05/15/2018

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happyBy Benjamin FranklinSee more RANDOM quotes

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Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy

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Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others.

05/15/2018

Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others.By Groucho Marx.See more RANDOM quotes

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Those are my principles. If you don

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When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.

05/15/2018

When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.By See more RANDOM quotes

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When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we

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Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.

05/15/2018

Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.

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I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses.

05/15/2018

I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses.By Stephen KingSee more RANDOM quotes

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I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses.

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There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.

05/15/2018

There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.By ShakespeareSee more RANDOM quotes

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There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.

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Underneath the skin, all humanity are brothers and I would gladly skin humanity alive to prove it.

05/15/2018

Underneath the skin, all humanity are brothers and I would gladly skin humanity alive to prove it.By Ellsworth TooheySee more RANDOM quotes

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Underneath the skin, all humanity are brothers and I would gladly skin humanity alive to prove it.

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Never give up, never give up, never, never, never give up!

05/15/2018

Never give up, never give up, never, never, never give up!By Winston ChurchillSee more RANDOM quotes

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Never give up, never give up, never, never, never give up!

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It is best to mince one's words very finely, it makes them much easier to eat afterwards.

05/15/2018

It is best to mince one's words very finely, it makes them much easier to eat afterwards.By Oscar WildeSee more RANDOM quotes

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It is best to mince one

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Never preceed anything more complex than a Frisbee throw with, 'Hey boss, watch this!

05/15/2018

Never preceed anything more complex than a Frisbee throw with, 'Hey boss, watch this!By See more RANDOM quotes

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Never preceed anything more complex than a Frisbee throw with,

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It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt

05/15/2018

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubtBy Mark TwainSee more RANDOM quotes

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It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one

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Only newspaper editors and people with tapeworms should ever refer to themselves as, 'we'

05/15/2018

Only newspaper editors and people with tapeworms should ever refer to themselves as, 'we'By Mark TwainSee more RANDOM quotes

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Only newspaper editors and people with tapeworms should ever refer to themselves as,

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The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.

05/15/2018

The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.By Bertrand RussellSee more RANDOM quotes

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The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.

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For business reasons, I must maintain the outward signs of sanity.

05/15/2018

For business reasons, I must maintain the outward signs of sanity.By Mark TwainSee more RANDOM quotes

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For business reasons, I must maintain the outward signs of sanity.

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How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same?

05/15/2018

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same?By See more RANDOM quotes

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How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same?

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If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

05/15/2018

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?By See more RANDOM quotes

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If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

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If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

05/15/2018

If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If at first you don

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I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties.

05/15/2018

I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties.By See more RANDOM quotes

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I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties.

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If it boils and is watched, it can't be a pot.

05/15/2018

If it boils and is watched, it can't be a pot.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If it boils and is watched, it can

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The second best policy is dishonesty

05/15/2018

The second best policy is dishonestyBy See more RANDOM quotes

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The second best policy is dishonesty

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I can't make predictions and I never will

05/15/2018

I can't make predictions and I never willBy See more RANDOM quotes

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I can

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There is no surer way to ruin a good discussion than to contaminate it with facts.

05/15/2018

There is no surer way to ruin a good discussion than to contaminate it with facts.By See more RANDOM quotes

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There is no surer way to ruin a good discussion than to contaminate it with facts.

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If you can remember the '60s, then you weren't there.

05/15/2018

If you can remember the '60s, then you weren't there.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you can remember the

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Practice makes perfect.

05/15/2018

Practice makes perfect.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Practice makes perfect.

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Smile, it makes people wonder what you're thinking.

05/15/2018

Smile, it makes people wonder what you're thinking.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Smile, it makes people wonder what you

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When all else fails, read the instructions.

05/15/2018

When all else fails, read the instructions.By See more RANDOM quotes

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When all else fails, read the instructions.

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It's not an optical illusion, it just looks that way.

05/15/2018

It's not an optical illusion, it just looks that way.By See more RANDOM quotes

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It

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Some drink at the fountain of knowledge...others just gargle.

05/15/2018

Some drink at the fountain of knowledge...others just gargle.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Some drink at the fountain of knowledge...others just gargle.

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