Do We Choose Love? or Love Chooses Us? - Nubian Lovebirds

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“I just want to know, when people say love will find you, do they mean even if I don’t do anything the right person will come by? I ask because all my life I’ve been told nothing good ever comes easy. You have to go get it.”

The simplest answer to the question of whether we choose love or love chooses us can be found in no other place than a scene in Harry Potter.

Harry had just gotten into Hogwarths, and after the initial hassle and stress, all students were finally gathered in the dining hall. 

They had the large dinner tables in front of them and everyone dug in, merry and chatty. Amidst the noise and excitement, Professor Dumbledore did his tumbler ringing thing; gave a dumbledore-esque speech and said something in the line of:

Let the Sorting Begin

SO everyone began to get up from their seats, one after the other as their names were called, and they all went towards the sorting hat, to find out the houses to which they belonged; the houses to which, according to the story, they’ve always belonged. 

They weren’t necessarily chosen for it, and they didn’t necessarily made a conscious choice for it. They just got allocated to where they had always belonged.

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The Choice is Love

So it can be said, for Harry Potter, at least, that there was no choice. Only paths to be followed. 

The trick, though, is that everyone had to MAKE THE MOVE to follow that path. Every fresh student of Hogwarths had to get up from their seats and move over to the sorting hat, and then they had to stay put as Professor McGonagall put the sorting hat over their heads.


See, the sorting hat will always assign the students to whichever houses they are meant to be in, but at the same time these Hogwarths students always have to MAKE THE MOVE themselves to get to the sorting hat.

Isn’t it beautiful and fascinating how simultaneous and co-dependent both of these actions/events are?

And that is exactly how love happens.

We don’t find love by sitting our asses down at home, playing frantic video games and watching tv shows; thinking well at least they say we don’t choose love love chooses us.

It does find you, and it will find you, but only after you make the move — and then voila, the great omniscient sorting hat of love decides which particluar set of arms in the world you belong to. 

Walk All Around the Globe in Search of love?

DOES this mean then that we can, and should, walk all over the streets; all over the whole frigging city, aimlessly every night; does this mean that we should go to every night club in the country, go to all the parties in the vicinity and beyond, to every social function, browse the entire world wide web, all in search of this beautiful thing called LOVE?

OF course NOT.

Why?! Simple. Because this is the part where love has to choose you, meaning you can simply walk every inch of this earth and not be chosen — yet.

And then again let’s say you do find someone you’re compatible with, You have chosen that person, and that person has chosen you. Still, in the long run Love has to choose you both — and by that we don’t mean anything metaphysical or preternatural, but simply that consequent events should be ideal enough, and be serene enough and beautiful enough that you both will then have no choice but to fall for each other.

Love is a Pot of Soup

Without all these ingredients in the pot — i.e you, at the very least, making a move or keeping your mind open to it, the universe and turn of events being ready for you, and events working in both your favors, you can’t really find love.

And yes you would be right to point out that sometimes we actually do anticipate to love someone. But at that point it is not love yet, but dating or just getting intimate.

You can very well date somebody without ever falling in love with them. Hell you might even have it in mind to fall very deeply and madly in love with that person but things just don’t click; the universe doesn’t approve and that vital, beautiful, sublime spark called love never comes to life.

Love at First Sight?

And yes, at NLv we do believe in that beautiful thing called love at first sight. And that is mostly a good sign. Love at first sight is the universe’s version of the sorting-hat meeting Draco Malfoy.

You see, in the Harry Potter movie when the sorting hat saw Draco Malfoy it never even needed to be placed fully on the boy’s head before it knew that he belonged in Slytherin. Now that is love at first sight — the universe’s way of pulling a partially-placed cocky and confident sorting hat. 

Striving to publish contents that are philosophically, emotionally, and intellectually resonant, our posts and articles are written based on questions, challenges, and topic suggestions provided by readers like you. Read more here on how to get your contributions to us and published. 

Do We Choose Love? or Love Chooses Us? - Nubian Lovebirds

“I just want to know, when people say love will find you, do they mean even if I don’t do anything the right person will come by? I ask because all my life





Do We Choose Love? or Love Chooses Us? - Nubian Lovebirds

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