Inspirational quotes

I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses.

05/15/2018

I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses.

By Stephen King

See more RANDOM quotes

VIEW MORE

I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses.

stephen-king random

The path to our destination is not always a straight one. We go down the wrong road, we get lost, we turn back. Maybe it doesn’t matter which road we embark on. Maybe what matters is that we embark.

05/15/2018

The path to our destination is not always a straight one. We go down the wrong road, we get lost, we turn back. Maybe it doesn’t matter which road we embark on. Maybe what matters is that we embark.

By Barbara Hall

See more LIFE quotes

VIEW MORE

The path to our destination is not always a straight one. We go down the wrong road, we get lost, we turn back. Maybe it doesn’t matter which road we embark on. Maybe what matters is that we embark.

barbara-hall life

I hate when I go to bed and I forget to turn my swag off.

05/15/2018

I hate when I go to bed and I forget to turn my swag off.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

I hate when I go to bed and I forget to turn my swag off.

unknown funny

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

05/15/2018

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

By George Carlin

See more SEX quotes

VIEW MORE

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

george-carlin sex

All my life I wanted to be someone. I guess I should have been more specific.

05/15/2018

All my life I wanted to be someone. I guess I should have been more specific.

By

See more RANDOM quotes

VIEW MORE

All my life I wanted to be someone. I guess I should have been more specific.

n-a random

If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.

05/15/2018

If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.

By Jim Rohn

See more LIFE quotes

VIEW MORE

If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.

jim-rohn life

Luck favors the well prepared.

05/15/2018

Luck favors the well prepared.

By anonymous

See more MOTIVATION & LEADERSHIP quotes

VIEW MORE

Luck favors the well prepared.

anonymous motivation-leadership

To be prepared for war is one of the most effective means of preserving peace.

05/15/2018

To be prepared for war is one of the most effective means of preserving peace.

By George Washington

See more MOTIVATION & LEADERSHIP quotes

VIEW MORE

To be prepared for war is one of the most effective means of preserving peace.

george-washington motivation-leadership

If you just set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing.

05/15/2018

If you just set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing.

By Margaret Thatcher

See more MOTIVATION & LEADERSHIP quotes

VIEW MORE

If you just set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing.

margaret-thatcher motivation-leadership

If you strangle a smurf, what color does it turn?

05/15/2018

If you strangle a smurf, what color does it turn?

By

See more RANDOM quotes

VIEW MORE

If you strangle a smurf, what color does it turn?

n-a random

You often meet your destiny on the road you’ve taken to avoid it.

05/15/2018

You often meet your destiny on the road you’ve taken to avoid it.

By

See more LIFE quotes

VIEW MORE

You often meet your destiny on the road you’ve taken to avoid it.

n-a life

A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd.

05/15/2018

A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd.

By Max Lucado

See more INSPIRATIONAL quotes

VIEW MORE

A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd.

max-lucado inspirational

We are too busy mopping the floor to turn off the faucet.

05/15/2018

We are too busy mopping the floor to turn off the faucet.

By Unknown

See more INSPIRATIONAL quotes

VIEW MORE

We are too busy mopping the floor to turn off the faucet.

unknown inspirational

Beautiful pictures are developed from negatives in a dark room. So if you see darkness in your life be reassured that a beautiful picture is being prepared.

05/15/2018

Beautiful pictures are developed from negatives in a dark room. So if you see darkness in your life be reassured that a beautiful picture is being prepared.

By Author Unknown

See more MOTIVATIONAL quotes

VIEW MORE

Beautiful pictures are developed from negatives in a dark room. So if you see darkness in your life be reassured that a beautiful picture is being prepared.

author-unknown motivational

Your goals are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life.

05/15/2018

Your goals are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life.

By Les Brown

See more INSPIRATIONAL quotes

VIEW MORE

Your goals are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life.

les-brown inspirational

If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.

05/15/2018

If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.

By Abigail Van Buren

See more INSPIRATIONAL quotes

VIEW MORE

If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.

abigail-van-buren inspirational

The road to enlightenment is paved with authenticity, not imitation.

05/15/2018

The road to enlightenment is paved with authenticity, not imitation.

By Alan Cohen

See more CREATIVITY quotes

VIEW MORE

The road to enlightenment is paved with authenticity, not imitation.

alan-cohen creativity

Only he that has traveled the road knows where the holes are deep.

05/15/2018

Only he that has traveled the road knows where the holes are deep.

By Chinese Proverb

See more TRAVEL quotes

VIEW MORE

Only he that has traveled the road knows where the holes are deep.

chinese-proverb travel

I have always known that at last I would take this road, but yesterday I did not know that it would be today.

05/15/2018

I have always known that at last I would take this road, but yesterday I did not know that it would be today.

By Japanese Haiku

See more LIFE quotes

VIEW MORE

I have always known that at last I would take this road, but yesterday I did not know that it would be today.

japanese-haiku life

People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.

05/15/2018

People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.

By Dalai Lama

See more LIFE quotes

VIEW MORE

People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.

dalai-lama life

If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.

05/15/2018

If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.

By Lewis Carroll

See more TRAVEL quotes

VIEW MORE

If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.

lewis-carroll travel

Sometimes our fate resembles a fruit tree in winter. Who would think that those branches would turn green again and blossom, but we hope it, we know it.

05/15/2018

Sometimes our fate resembles a fruit tree in winter. Who would think that those branches would turn green again and blossom, but we hope it, we know it.

By Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

See more MOTIVATION &

VIEW MORE

Sometimes our fate resembles a fruit tree in winter. Who would think that those branches would turn green again and blossom, but we hope it, we know it.

johann-wolfgang-von-goethe motivation-leadership

People take different roads seeking fulfilment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.

05/15/2018

People take different roads seeking fulfilment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.

By H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

See more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

VIEW MORE

People take different roads seeking fulfilment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.

h-jackson-brown-jr famous-people

Those who turn good organizations into great organizations are motivated by a deep creative urge and an inner compulsion for sheer unadulterated excellence for its own sake.

05/15/2018

Those who turn good organizations into great organizations are motivated by a deep creative urge and an inner compulsion for sheer unadulterated excellence for its own sake.

By Jim Collins

See more MOTIVATION & LEADERSHIP quotes

VIEW MORE

Those who turn good organizations into great organizations are motivated by a deep creative urge and an inner compulsion for sheer unadulterated excellence for its own sake.

jim-collins motivation-leadership

You are not defined by your past. You are prepared by your past.

05/15/2018

You are not defined by your past. You are prepared by your past.

By Joel Osteen

See more INSPIRATIONAL quotes

VIEW MORE

You are not defined by your past. You are prepared by your past.

joel-osteen inspirational

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sen

05/15/2018

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.

By

VIEW MORE

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sen

melody-beattie happiness-wellbeing

Take time to work - it is the price of success Take time to think - it is the source of power Take time to play - it is the secret of perpetual youth Take time to read - it is the fountain of wisdom Take time to be friendly - it is the road to happiness T

05/15/2018

Take time to work - it is the price of success Take time to think - it is the source of power Take time to play - it is the secret of perpetual youth Take time to read - it is the fountain of wisdom Take time to be friendly - it is the road to happiness Take time to love and be loved - it is the nourishment of the soul Take time to share - it is too short a life to be selfish

VIEW MORE

Take time to work - it is the price of success Take time to think - it is the source of power Take time to play - it is the secret of perpetual youth Take time to read - it is the fountain of wisdom Take time to be friendly - it is the road to happiness T

anonymous happiness-wellbeing

My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying.

05/15/2018

My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying.

unknown funny

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, ‘Oh crap, she’s up.’

05/15/2018

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, ‘Oh crap, she’s up.’

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, ‘Oh crap, she’s up.’

unknown funny

The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

05/15/2018

The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

By AL MCGUIRE

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

al-mcguire funny

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.

05/15/2018

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.

By SOCRATES

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.

socrates funny

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car.

05/15/2018

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car.

By BOB MONKHOUSE

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car.

bob-monkhouse funny

Wouldn’t it be nice if the world was flat? That way we could just push off the people we don’t like.

05/15/2018

Wouldn’t it be nice if the world was flat? That way we could just push off the people we don’t like.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

Wouldn’t it be nice if the world was flat? That way we could just push off the people we don’t like.

unknown funny

I stay up late every night and realize it’s a bad idea every morning.

05/15/2018

I stay up late every night and realize it’s a bad idea every morning.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

I stay up late every night and realize it’s a bad idea every morning.

unknown funny

During a test, people look up for inspiration, down in desperation, and left and right for information.

05/15/2018

During a test, people look up for inspiration, down in desperation, and left and right for information.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

During a test, people look up for inspiration, down in desperation, and left and right for information.

unknown funny

Alarm Clocks: because every morning should begin with a heart attack.

05/15/2018

Alarm Clocks: because every morning should begin with a heart attack.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

Alarm Clocks: because every morning should begin with a heart attack.

unknown funny

I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.

05/15/2018

I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.

unknown funny

If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.

05/15/2018

If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.

unknown funny

It’s all fun and games, until someone calls the cops. Then it’s a new game; hide and seek.

05/15/2018

It’s all fun and games, until someone calls the cops. Then it’s a new game; hide and seek.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

It’s all fun and games, until someone calls the cops. Then it’s a new game; hide and seek.

unknown funny

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.

05/15/2018

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.

By DAVE BARRY

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.

dave-barry funny

The two best times to keep your mouth shut are when you’re swimming and when you’re angry.

05/15/2018

The two best times to keep your mouth shut are when you’re swimming and when you’re angry.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

The two best times to keep your mouth shut are when you’re swimming and when you’re angry.

unknown funny

Next time your girl wants you to take her somewhere expensive, take her to the gas station, almost 5.00/gallon.

05/15/2018

Next time your girl wants you to take her somewhere expensive, take her to the gas station, almost 5.00/gallon.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

Next time your girl wants you to take her somewhere expensive, take her to the gas station, almost 5.00/gallon.

unknown funny

Silence is golden; duct tape is silver.

05/15/2018

Silence is golden; duct tape is silver.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

Silence is golden; duct tape is silver.

unknown funny

Just remember, if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.

05/15/2018

Just remember, if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

Just remember, if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.

unknown funny

We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

05/15/2018

We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

unknown funny

If you watch Home Alone backwards, it’s a story about two men who are helped out of traps by a young child, who then cleans them up. Then, the child’s family comes home and yells at him.

05/15/2018

If you watch Home Alone backwards, it’s a story about two men who are helped out of traps by a young child, who then cleans them up. Then, the child’s family comes home and yells at him.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

If you watch Home Alone backwards, it’s a story about two men who are helped out of traps by a young child, who then cleans them up. Then, the child’s family comes home and yells at him.

unknown funny

A baby-sitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out acting like teenagers.

05/15/2018

A baby-sitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out acting like teenagers.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

A baby-sitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out acting like teenagers.

unknown funny

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.

05/15/2018

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.

By ANONYMOUS

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.

anonymous funny

Most people are only alive because it’s illegal to shoot them.

05/15/2018

Most people are only alive because it’s illegal to shoot them.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

Most people are only alive because it’s illegal to shoot them.

unknown funny

A politician is a fellow who will lay your life down for his country.

05/15/2018

A politician is a fellow who will lay your life down for his country.

By Unknown

See more FUNNY quotes

VIEW MORE

A politician is a fellow who will lay your life down for his country.

unknown funny