Inspirational quotes

A politician is a fellow who will lay your life down for his country.

05/15/2018

A politician is a fellow who will lay your life down for his country.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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A politician is a fellow who will lay your life down for his country.

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A good friend will help you move, a best friend will help you move a dead body.

05/15/2018

A good friend will help you move, a best friend will help you move a dead body.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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A good friend will help you move, a best friend will help you move a dead body.

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Friendship is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel it.

05/15/2018

Friendship is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel it.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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Friendship is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel it.

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I’m so broke, I can’t even pay attention.

05/15/2018

I’m so broke, I can’t even pay attention.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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I’m so broke, I can’t even pay attention.

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Silence is golden; duct tape is silver.

05/15/2018

Silence is golden; duct tape is silver.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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Silence is golden; duct tape is silver.

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Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, ‘Oh crap, she’s up.’

05/15/2018

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, ‘Oh crap, she’s up.’By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, ‘Oh crap, she’s up.’

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I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.

05/15/2018

I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.

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Of course I’m not perfect; there’s a crack in my ass!

05/15/2018

Of course I’m not perfect; there’s a crack in my ass!By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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Of course I’m not perfect; there’s a crack in my ass!

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I’m great in bed; I can sleep for days.

05/15/2018

I’m great in bed; I can sleep for days.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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I’m great in bed; I can sleep for days.

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Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

05/15/2018

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.By Bill McGlashenSee more FUNNY quotes

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Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

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If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, just try missing a couple of payments.

05/15/2018

If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, just try missing a couple of payments.By Earl WilsonSee more FUNNY quotes

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If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, just try missing a couple of payments.

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If she were a president, she’d be Baberham Lincoln.

05/15/2018

If she were a president, she’d be Baberham Lincoln.By Garth BrooksSee more FUNNY quotes

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If she were a president, she’d be Baberham Lincoln.

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Just remember, if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.

05/15/2018

Just remember, if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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Just remember, if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.

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It’s useless to hold a person to anything they say when they are in love, drunk, or running for office.

05/15/2018

It’s useless to hold a person to anything they say when they are in love, drunk, or running for office.By Shirley MacLaineSee more FUNNY quotes

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It’s useless to hold a person to anything they say when they are in love, drunk, or running for office.

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My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying.

05/15/2018

My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying.

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I’m gonna go take a hot shower. It’s like a normal shower, but with me in it.

05/15/2018

I’m gonna go take a hot shower. It’s like a normal shower, but with me in it.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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I’m gonna go take a hot shower. It’s like a normal shower, but with me in it.

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We kill people who kill people because killing people is wrong.

05/15/2018

We kill people who kill people because killing people is wrong.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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We kill people who kill people because killing people is wrong.

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If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.

05/15/2018

If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.

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It’s all fun and games, until someone calls the cops. Then it’s a new game; hide and seek.

05/15/2018

It’s all fun and games, until someone calls the cops. Then it’s a new game; hide and seek.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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It’s all fun and games, until someone calls the cops. Then it’s a new game; hide and seek.

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We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

05/15/2018

We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

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Etc. – End of Thinking Capacity.

05/15/2018

Etc. – End of Thinking Capacity.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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Etc. – End of Thinking Capacity.

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I put the pro in procrastinate.

05/15/2018

I put the pro in procrastinate.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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I put the pro in procrastinate.

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I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed.

05/15/2018

I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed.By William ShakespeareSee more FUNNY quotes

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I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed.

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People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

05/15/2018

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.By Winnie the PoohSee more FUNNY quotes

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People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

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Out of all the lies I’ve told, “Just kidding!” is my favourite.

05/15/2018

Out of all the lies I’ve told, “Just kidding!” is my favourite.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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Out of all the lies I’ve told, “Just kidding!” is my favourite.

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May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short.

05/15/2018

May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short.

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I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life.

05/15/2018

I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life.By Ziad K. AbdelnourSee more FUNNY quotes

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I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life.

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Accept who you are, unless you’re a serial killer.

05/15/2018

Accept who you are, unless you’re a serial killer.By Ellen DegeneresSee more FUNNY quotes

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Accept who you are, unless you’re a serial killer.

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People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.

05/15/2018

People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.By Joan RiversSee more FUNNY quotes

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People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.

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After Tuesday, even the calendar goes “W T F”.

05/15/2018

After Tuesday, even the calendar goes “W T F”.By UnknownSee more FUNNY quotes

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After Tuesday, even the calendar goes “W T F”.

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Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.

05/15/2018

Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.By Eleanor RooseveltSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.

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All mankind is divided into three classes: those who are immovable, those who are movable; and those who move.

05/15/2018

All mankind is divided into three classes: those who are immovable, those who are movable; and those who move.By Benjamin FranklinSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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All mankind is divided into three classes: those who are immovable, those who are movable; and those who move.

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This above all: to thine own self be true. And it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.

05/15/2018

This above all: to thine own self be true. And it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.By William Shakespeare (Hamlet)See more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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This above all: to thine own self be true. And it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.

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Civilization is a stream with banks. The stream is sometimes filled with blood from people killing, stealing, shouting and doing the things historians usually record, while on the banks, unnoticed, people build homes, make love, raise children, sing songs

05/15/2018

Civilization is a stream with banks. The stream is sometimes filled with blood from people killing, stealing, shouting and doing the things historians usually record, while on the banks, unnoticed, people build homes, make love, raise children, sing songs, write poetry and even whittle statues. The story of civilization is what happened on the banks.By

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Civilization is a stream with banks. The stream is sometimes filled with blood from people killing, stealing, shouting and doing the things historians usually record, while on the banks, unnoticed, people build homes, make love, raise children, sing songs

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Feeling grateful or appreciative of someone or something in your life actually attracts more of the things that you appreciate and value into your life.

05/15/2018

Feeling grateful or appreciative of someone or something in your life actually attracts more of the things that you appreciate and value into your life.By Northrup ChristianeSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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Feeling grateful or appreciative of someone or something in your life actually attracts more of the things that you appreciate and value into your life.

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A man is ethical only when life, as such, is sacred to him, that of plants and animals as that of his fellow men, and when he devotes himself helpfully to all life that is in need of help.

05/15/2018

A man is ethical only when life, as such, is sacred to him, that of plants and animals as that of his fellow men, and when he devotes himself helpfully to all life that is in need of help.By Albert SchweitzerSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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A man is ethical only when life, as such, is sacred to him, that of plants and animals as that of his fellow men, and when he devotes himself helpfully to all life that is in need of help.

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Real peace is not the absence of conflict, it is the presence of justice

05/15/2018

Real peace is not the absence of conflict, it is the presence of justiceBy Film: ‘Air Force One’See more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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Real peace is not the absence of conflict, it is the presence of justice

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All that is necessary for evil to succeed is for good men to do nothing.

05/15/2018

All that is necessary for evil to succeed is for good men to do nothing.By Edmund BurkeSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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All that is necessary for evil to succeed is for good men to do nothing.

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If we don’t believe in freedom of expression for people we despise, we don’t believe in it at all.

05/15/2018

If we don’t believe in freedom of expression for people we despise, we don’t believe in it at all.By Noam ChomskySee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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If we don’t believe in freedom of expression for people we despise, we don’t believe in it at all.

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The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.

05/15/2018

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.By George Bernard ShawSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.

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A human being is part of a whole, called by us the Universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind

05/15/2018

A human being is part of a whole, called by us the Universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be

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A human being is part of a whole, called by us the Universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind

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Everything can be taken from a man but...the last of the human freedoms - to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

05/15/2018

Everything can be taken from a man but...the last of the human freedoms - to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.By Viktor FranklSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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Everything can be taken from a man but...the last of the human freedoms - to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

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Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box.

05/15/2018

Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box.By See more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box.

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Just because you are not interested in politics, does not mean that politics is not interested in you.

05/15/2018

Just because you are not interested in politics, does not mean that politics is not interested in you.By PericlesSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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Just because you are not interested in politics, does not mean that politics is not interested in you.

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Common sense, to most people, is nothing more than their own opinions.

05/15/2018

Common sense, to most people, is nothing more than their own opinions.By William HazlittSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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Common sense, to most people, is nothing more than their own opinions.

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An eye for an eye will only serve to make the whole world blind.

05/15/2018

An eye for an eye will only serve to make the whole world blind.By Mahatma GandhiSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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An eye for an eye will only serve to make the whole world blind.

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You can stand tall without standing on someone. You can be a victor without having victims.

05/15/2018

You can stand tall without standing on someone. You can be a victor without having victims.By Harriet WoodsSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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You can stand tall without standing on someone. You can be a victor without having victims.

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I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of tort

05/15/2018

I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides

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I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of tort

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He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.

05/15/2018

He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.By Raymond HullSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.

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Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.

05/15/2018

Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.By Albert CamusSee more FAMOUS PEOPLE quotes

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Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.

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