Inspirational quotes

I've had amnesia for as long as I can remember

05/15/2018

I've had amnesia for as long as I can rememberBy See more RANDOM quotes

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I

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I've got a mind like a.. a.. what's that thing called?

05/15/2018

I've got a mind like a.. a.. what's that thing called?By See more RANDOM quotes

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I

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It's not the heights that bother me it's falling on the bottoms of them.

05/15/2018

It's not the heights that bother me it's falling on the bottoms of them.By See more RANDOM quotes

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It

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It's a small world, but I'd hate to have to paint it.

05/15/2018

It's a small world, but I'd hate to have to paint it.By See more RANDOM quotes

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It

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It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong.

05/15/2018

It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong.By VoltaireSee more RANDOM quotes

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It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong.

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It doesn't matter how you get there if you don't know where you're going.

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It doesn't matter how you get there if you don't know where you're going.By See more RANDOM quotes

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It doesn

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If you want someone to catch something, throw it at their nose.

05/15/2018

If you want someone to catch something, throw it at their nose.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you want someone to catch something, throw it at their nose.

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If you lend someone £20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

05/15/2018

If you lend someone £20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you lend someone £20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

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If you strangle a smurf, what color does it turn?

05/15/2018

If you strangle a smurf, what color does it turn?By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you strangle a smurf, what color does it turn?

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If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?

05/15/2018

If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?

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If today is the first day of the rest of your life, what was yesterday?

05/15/2018

If today is the first day of the rest of your life, what was yesterday?By See more RANDOM quotes

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If today is the first day of the rest of your life, what was yesterday?

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If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?

05/15/2018

If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?By See more RANDOM quotes

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If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?

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If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

05/15/2018

If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.By Johnny CarsonSee more RANDOM quotes

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If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

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If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

05/15/2018

If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If it weren

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I'm having a deja vu experience, just like last time.

05/15/2018

I'm having a deja vu experience, just like last time.By See more RANDOM quotes

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I

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I'm feeling argumentative. Please contradict me.

05/15/2018

I'm feeling argumentative. Please contradict me.By See more RANDOM quotes

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I

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If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.

05/15/2018

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.

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If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

05/15/2018

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.By See more RANDOM quotes

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If you tell the truth, you don

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I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges

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I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without spongesBy See more RANDOM quotes

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I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges

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I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.

05/15/2018

I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.By See more RANDOM quotes

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I used to be indecisive, now I

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I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.

05/15/2018

I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.By See more RANDOM quotes

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I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.

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I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.

05/15/2018

I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.By See more RANDOM quotes

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I didn

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I am not young enough to know everything.

05/15/2018

I am not young enough to know everything.By Oscar WildeSee more RANDOM quotes

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I am not young enough to know everything.

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How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

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How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?By See more RANDOM quotes

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How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

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He's supposed to sound like he's in pain, he's a folk singer.

05/15/2018

He's supposed to sound like he's in pain, he's a folk singer.By See more RANDOM quotes

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He

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He who laughs last didn't understand the joke

05/15/2018

He who laughs last didn't understand the jokeBy See more RANDOM quotes

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He who laughs last didn

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Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

05/15/2018

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

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Ask me about my vow of silence.

05/15/2018

Ask me about my vow of silence.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Ask me about my vow of silence.

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As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

05/15/2018

As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.By See more RANDOM quotes

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As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

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Happiness makes up in height what it lacks in length.

05/15/2018

Happiness makes up in height what it lacks in length.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Happiness makes up in height what it lacks in length.

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Hangover: The wrath of grapes.

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Hangover: The wrath of grapes.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Hangover: The wrath of grapes.

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you can sell him some tackle

05/15/2018

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you can sell him some tackleBy See more RANDOM quotes

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you can sell him some tackle

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Frisbeetarianism: The belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

05/15/2018

Frisbeetarianism: The belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Frisbeetarianism: The belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

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Free jazz is so called because no-one would ever buy it.

05/15/2018

Free jazz is so called because no-one would ever buy it.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Free jazz is so called because no-one would ever buy it.

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Experience is something you get just after you need it.

05/15/2018

Experience is something you get just after you need it.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Experience is something you get just after you need it.

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Everyone is someone else's weirdo.

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Everyone is someone else's weirdo.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Everyone is someone else

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Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

05/15/2018

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don

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Entertainment is just talking louder than the audience.

05/15/2018

Entertainment is just talking louder than the audience.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Entertainment is just talking louder than the audience.

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Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

05/15/2018

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Eagles may soar, but weasels don

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Don't worry about the world ending today, it's already tomorrow in Australia

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Don't worry about the world ending today, it's already tomorrow in AustraliaBy See more RANDOM quotes

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Don

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Don't worry about avoiding temptation - as you grow older, it starts avoiding you.

05/15/2018

Don't worry about avoiding temptation - as you grow older, it starts avoiding you.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Don

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Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.

05/15/2018

Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Don

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Don't personify computers - we don't like it.

05/15/2018

Don't personify computers - we don't like it.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Don

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Diplomacy is the art of saying 'good doggie' while looking for a bigger stick.

05/15/2018

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'good doggie' while looking for a bigger stick.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Diplomacy is the art of saying

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Did you know the word gullible is not in the dictionary?

05/15/2018

Did you know the word gullible is not in the dictionary?By See more RANDOM quotes

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Did you know the word gullible is not in the dictionary?

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Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.

05/15/2018

Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.

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Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

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Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

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Caution: do not look into laser with remaining eye.

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Caution: do not look into laser with remaining eye.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Caution: do not look into laser with remaining eye.

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Breaking the law of gravity isn't painful it's getting caught that hurts.

05/15/2018

Breaking the law of gravity isn't painful it's getting caught that hurts.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Breaking the law of gravity isn

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Boomerangs are coming back, Ski slopes are going downhill, but Exit signs are on the way out.

05/15/2018

Boomerangs are coming back, Ski slopes are going downhill, but Exit signs are on the way out.By See more RANDOM quotes

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Boomerangs are coming back, Ski slopes are going downhill, but Exit signs are on the way out.

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